Monday, March 30, 2009

Friendship and Sacrifice Writing

•Do you think that most people feel the need to be a little better than their friends? Is this a necessary part of friendship? Can you be friends with someone who you think is superior to you?

•How do you see this play into Amir and Hassan’s friendship? Are they truly friends? Please cite at least one passage in your response.

29 comments:

Pye said...

I think everyone needs to feel a little bit better than their friends. anyone who feels inferior to someone else they probably wont be friends with them. I dont think that Amir and Hassan are really friends. People who live near and grow up near eachother wont always become friends but sometimes just hang out with eachother because ther is nothing better to do.

Nicole said...

People are naturally competitive towards one another. The only difference is that when you are friends with that person you have to be secret about it.
It is not necessary for friendship, it is just part of the human mind.
You can be friends with someone who is "superior" but the friendship will probably not be the same for the other person.

They're semi-friends. Amir has complete control over Hassan and can convince him to do anything. Amir even states it, "Hassan never denied me anything." So, it's not so much as friendship as it is control over the other.

JasonV said...

I think that people who have true friendship don't feel the need to be better than their friends, they accept them for who they are and realize that everyone has different strengths and weaknesses that they can't change. People who are kind of friends or just buddies etc. do feel the need to be better than their friends in some aspects so that they can feel better about themselves. You can be friends with someone who you think is superior to you, thats what I think of some of my friends.

I think that even if their friendship has drifted apart a bit, Amir and Hassan are rtuly friends. When Amir is talking about Passat as a child, it leads me to believe they are truly friends, "Hassan and I used to climb the poplar trees in the driveway of my fathers house and annoy our neighbors by refelcting sunlight into their homes with a shard of mirror" (Hosseini 3).

Jake H said...

Yes, I think that they do feel like they are better then. It makes them win the competition. And yes i can be friends with someone who is supiror to me. Being the best isn't always the most important, it's about being around people who make you laugh and smile and help you when your down.
They really like each other, they do have problems but they are still true friends. I say this because even though they are two totally seperate classes they still act like best friends. For example, when they were walking through the lumber yard, the workers were saying rude stuff about Hassan's mother and Amir comforted him, and told him it wasn't true.

KatieW said...

I do think that most peope feel the need to be a little better than their friends, but I do not think that is a necessary part of friendship. You can definitely be friends with someone who is superior to you because even though you might feel that way, there are qualities that both of the friends will have that will balance it out.

This is like Hassan and Amir's friendship because even though Amir is obviously suuperior to Hassan, Amir is still jealous of him because of how much his father respects him. Amir is not a true friend to Hassan, but Hassan is a true friend to Amir. For example, when Hassan went to go get the kite he got himself into trouble with bullys, and he risked his life for Amir while Amir just stood there and watched.

Liap said...

I think that most people do feel the need to be better than their friends but there is also a select group that feel like their friends should be superior, to prove to themselves that they can make these friends and that in that way they feel better about themselves.

The friendship between Amir and Hassan depends completely on the difference in class. Amir feels that he must be superaior and the focus of attention, whereas Hassan feels okay with being the inferior one in the relationship. This is shown when Amir tells Hassan that imbecile means that a person is smart, and Hassan is appreciative for the lesson, even though Amir feels better about himself because he knows the true meaning.

Allie~J said...

Yes, it doesn't have to be but for some friendships it's needed. SOme people need to learn from others and those others are superior to them. I could be but I pick friends who I can relate to easily and who may be either the same with me or a little higher or lower than me.
Amir and Hassan are best friends but Amir always wants to be the star and always makes sure to remind Hassan of his place. I think yes they are truly friends but they need to both learn to balance their superiorness. Hassan is poor but has the heart that is superior and Amir has the the richness and a big well known father. For example when Amir reads to Hassan and Hassan asks what a word means and Amir makes him feel like he's stupid for not knowing it then he gives him the wrong definition.

NowlanS said...

I think a lot of people feel the need to be better then their friends. This not a necessary part of frienship. It is easy to be friends with people that feel superior to you, but if they make themselves superior is when it is hard to be friends with some people. I am friends with people that to me feel superior but the person does not make themselves out to be superior. Amir and Hassan are true friends because they do not care about social status and other such things. In the middle of chatper two on page seven these soldiers taunt and yell at hassan about his mother. Amir comforts him and assures him that they were not talking about his mother. That showed true friendship.

RachelK said...

1. Most definitely. Everyone has their own special traits and some might be stronger than others. If one of my friends is extremely athletic and I'm not, I would feel inferior by it. I would support them in what they do. Everyone has their own place in school, jobs, and life. Some may seem superior to others, and that's ok. It's just how it turns out. Sometimes, friends want to feel important, and worrying about their well being and how successful they are. And yes, it is sometimes a necessary part of a friendship.

2. I think that they are really friends, they just have some rough spots like any other friendship. Early in the novel, Amir hears Hassan's voice saying "For you, a thousand times over." To me this means that despite any superiority, Hassan would do anything for Amir. That's what friends are for.

ddenton76 said...

I think that competition in friendships keep the friendships healthy. its only when you start getting jealous when the friendship starts getting unhealthy. you can be friends with sombody that is superior to you as long as you dont get jealous. but it is good to have a little bit of competition between the friends.

I think that Amir is a little jealous of Hassan because Amir's dad treats him differently than Hassan. His dad kinda acts like he isn't proud of Amir and i think that Amir see's it. Amir reads books and things instead of playing alot of sports and when the bully comes around Hassan has to protect Amir and Amir's father sees that Amir isn't very tough

ellenj said...

1. I think that a lot of people feel like they need to be better than their friends in some way, but i dont think it's necessary. It's just very common. You can be friends with anyone. It doesn't matter if they're "better" than you in your mind, you can still have alot in common and get along.

2. I think that Amir is only friends with Hassan because he knows he is "better" than him, and they live together. Even though he is jealous of his dad's affection to Hassan, he is still richer and more respected.

“Hassan and I fed from the same breasts. We took our first steps on the same lawn in the same yard. And, under the same roof, we spoke our first words. Mine was Baba. His was Amir. My name.” (Chapter 2 pg 11) This quote shows that while they have a bond, Amir is not focused on the friendship.

AprilH said...

Yes I do believe that most people feel the need to be better than their friends because I think that you are always going to be secretly competitive against each other. I don't think it's necessary part of friendship because you can be equal with your friend too. Yes you can because it can make you want to work harder.
How I see this play into Amir and Haasan's friendship is when Amir talks about how he is sometimes jealous of Haasan and how he teases him because he can't read and other things. I don't think they are truly friends because Amir talks about how when his rich friends are over he doesn't play with Haasan. He plays with Haasan whenever he is bored, "I never thought of Haasan and me as friends either."

nilec said...

I feel that as competitive humans it is natural for us to try and be better than our friends and those around us. It is not always a necessary but is an inevitable part of friendships. as long as you are comfortale with yourself you can be friends with someone that is superior to you. But at the same time, who is to say that they are superior to you?


I think that Hassan and Amir's relationship shows that it is possible to befriend somethat that is superior and be true friends.

samh said...

I think that a lot of people feel like they have to be better than their friends. I dont think this is a necessary part of friendship because friends should be able to be themselves when their together and not have to worry about whose better even though many times they do worry about this. I definitely think you can be friends with someone who you think might be superior to you. This plays in to Amir and Hassan's relationship in that I think the only reason Amir is friends with Hassan is because he feels that he is superior to Hassan. I think that Hassan is a true friend to Amir but sometimes it doesnt seem that Amir is a true friend to Hassan. We see their friendship as a true friendship sometimes and not a true one other times. In chapter two, on page 7 there are soldiers who a tanting Hassan about his mother and making him feel bad when Amir steps in and helps to comfort him. In this case I see Amir as a true friend.

allison t said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
michellev said...

I think that some people feel the need to be a little better than their friends but not all people have tat view point. I don't think you can say that it is a necessary part of friendship, but there are things that some people will be better than other people are, their will always be something that your friend is better at or something you will be better at. I do have friends that think they are maybe a little superior than me, but we are still friends and relate to a lot of things. I couldn't be friends with someone who thought they ruled over me and made me like worship them, thats mean.

But i think they are truly friends, just because one might think they are better than the other doesn't mean they can't be friends. "Yes father, Hassan would mumble, looking down at his feet. But he never told on me."(Hosseini pg. 4)

Macy said...

Yes, I think people feel they need to be better than their friends. It's just natural to have competition between others. People do not like being "lower" then their friends or feeling infeior.

Yes, Amir and Hassan do have this relationship. Amir basically takes over Hassan's life. And he feels he must be better than Hassan.

allison t said...

I think that people always want to be better than everyone else, even their friends. Most people are intimidated to talk to someone who is superior to them, therefore you aren't going to be friends with someone who is superior or inferior to you. Amir and Hassan's freindship is different than this because they have known eachother since they were born and because of that they can be friends and Amir can feel superior to Hassan.

JeniC said...

Honestly, how can you be better than a friend? If you are superior to a friend in one way, chances are that that friend is superior to you in a different way. For example, you may think that a friend is prettier than you, but perhaps you’re a lot more intelligent. There is no way to truly judge if you are "better" than your friends. If you begin to believe that a friends is far more superior to you, your friendship may grow apart.

I believe that Hassan viewed himself and Amir as friends, yet Amir did not because he often felt far superior to Hassan. Amir even says that he doesn't view Hassan as his friend, "The curious thing was, I never thought of Hassan and me as friends either"(Hosseini 25).

meghank said...

I think that competition is human nature so everyone is always trying to be better than someone else. I do not think that it is a necessary part of friendship though it is possible to be friends with someone who you think is better than you because it can give you someone to look up to.

I think that they are truly friends but Amir looks up to Hassan "Hassan Never denied me anything. And he was deadly with his slingshot." (Hosseini 4)

BrianW said...

I think that most people feel the need to be a little bit better. It’s not a necessary part of a friendship but it could improve your friendship.
I don’t think that Amir and Hassan are really friends, because of their difent life styles. Amir controls Hassan and can convince him to do anything that he wants him to do.

Emma said...

I think that some people feel like they have to be superior to their friends but I don't think that everyone needs to be superior. Its not a necessary part of friendship, not everyone feels like they need to be superior. But everyone is naturally competative so they will compete to be better but they dont have to be better.

I dont think that Amir and Hassan are completely friends, but they have fond memories of eachother and they spend time with eachother because they grew up together, but one person controls the other more. Amir controls Hassan and can get him to do what he wants. But i think because of the fond memories they still like eachother, "When we were children, Hassan and I used to climb the poplar trees in the driveway of my father's house and annoy our neighbors..."

elizabeth k said...

No, If someone feels the need to be better than someone else then i would not say that they are friends. people should be comfortable with who they truely are around their friends. a true friend should not be self centered and should care more about a friend than themselves.

i think that they are "fake" friends. i feel that they care more about themselves than eachother.

Shay N said...

You can be friends with anyone but they can’t seem superior to you all the time you have to have the sense that you have the power and that they are listening to you. I don’t think that Amir and Hassan are friends because Amir feels like he is disappointment to his father and that his father likes Hassan more than him. This keeps Amir from really becoming friends with Hassan and actually saying that he is a friend of him. Amir hangs out with Hassan because he is around and doesn’t bully him like a lot of the other kids.

adamc said...

No because if you need to be better then everyone else then you don't really want to be friends you just want someone to be better then. Yes they are really self centered and think that they are better then you.
I do think that they are good friends because they didn't go out looking for that it just happened. They are because on page 3 Hassin doesn't blame throwing the rocks at the dog on someone else.

Mark W said...

I think that most people feel the need to be better than their friends because they want to feel better about themselves. This is a necessary role in friendship because that person who believes they are more superior will then help the less superior friend by making them feel more superior. You can be friends with a more superior friend because they will help make you become more superior.

Amir is obviously the superior friend in their friendship. Amir is working for Amir's family, but Amir still treats Hassan with respect. Hassan then feels more superior because he is friends with a higher class person. I don't think they are actually friends because when Hassan gets the final kite after the kite battle, Amir doesn't try to rescue Hassan. They hang around each other because they live in the same house, but they aren't very close.

georged said...

It is quite natural for people to want to be better than their friends. This comes from human's tendency to be competitive, to be greedy. The caveman that kills the larger mammoth will live better than the one who kills a smaller one. He wanted to be better than his caveman friend because he would have a real advantage. For better or worse, this also translates to modern day society. We always compare ourselves against each other. If we are not as good or better, we see this as a disadvantage and work towards eliminating it. By being a little better than our friends, the people we compare ourselves against, we have an increased sense of self confidence and an idea of success. This is by no means actually necessary to be friends. In reality, we would probably be better friends to each other if we were not always trying to compete, and just be content with what we have. Everyone has their strengths and weaknesses, but we seem to think it is bad to have weaknesses, when that is really natural. When we accept each other for who we are, we become friends. In my opinion, no one is ever superior to the next person. Even if one person may be 'smarter' in school, the next person will certainly have strengths in other areas. Because we are all equal, we can all be friends with each other, as long as our egos stay out of the way. When we think that we are better or they are better (judging each other), our egos are blocking any chance of real friendship.

In Amir and Hassan's "friendship," Amir recognizes that Hassan is smarter, more athletic than him, and is equally or more favored by Baba than him. Amir wants to be better than Hassan because of his ego. He considers himself better than Hassan because he is of a higher class, so he should be better. However, I do not consider them to be friends because there is a constant power struggle. Amir only looks at Hassan as his servant whom he is embarrassed by and is only good for someone to play with when he is bored. There is no real emotional attachment that Amir should have for Hassan that would usually be in a friendship. For example, "I was sorry, but I didn't cry and I didn't chase the car" (109). Amir recognizes that he should feel bad for him (is sorry) but really doesn't care because he did absolutely nothing to stop him from leaving. Amir does not care, so he is not a friend of Hassan.

annies said...

I think that it is almost human nature to feel superior; it is just more noticeable when someone feels that they need to be superior to their friends. So yes, more people feel the need to be a little better than their friends. I don’t think it is a necessary part of friendship, because it could cause arguments and could potentially end the friendship. I think you can be friends with someone who is superior to you because sometimes, superiority can be classified as having more money than someone else, or having one of you parents having a higher placed job than another. Some people, who are rich, are friends with someone who don’t have as much money. Superiority can also be classified if someone is better looking than someone else. People who are not as good looking are friends with good looking people, so you can be friends with someone you feel superior to, or someone superior to you.

Aaron H. said...

Everyone is competitive in some respect. Therefore, it is only natural for friends to feel a need to be better than their other friends. Anyone can be friends with anyone; even if they think they are inferior to that person because everyone is better than someone at something. Amir and Hassan are friends in Hassan’s eyes but not in Amir’s eyes which makes their relationship fake. “ That you were the best friend he ever had,” (Hosseini 306)